Now, before you get all excited, take note that the Monty Python guys – John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Michael Palin – will be lending their voices to the movie, which is a mixture of computer animation and live action. Terry Jones will be directing the film. The movie is about aliens who give a human the power to do absolutely anything. The aliens did this not out of benevolence but as some sort of prank to see how the human will make a mess of things with his new powers. There is talk that Robin Williams will also be included in the movie, voicing a talking dog who actually knows more about what is happening.

If you’re a hard core Monty Python fan then you’d have noticed two names that are missing from the article – Graham Chapman died in the 80s and Eric Idle hasn’t officially signed on yet to do the movie.

Terry Jones is warning fans though that Absolutely Anything is not a Monty Python movie, though he said that it will have some of the sensibilities of the legendary comedy troupe. It may not be the actual Monty Python reunion that everyone is hoping for but this is the closest we’ll get to one and for that we should all be excited.

Synopsis: Finally retired detective William R. Somerset (Morgan Freeman) and recently acquitted former detective David Mills (Brad Pitt) are hired by a rival food chain as private investigators, to the figure out the competition’s “secret sauce” but what they find will take them to the darkest depths of the fast food business.

Memorable Scene: A moving moment, where William Somerset has to convince his partner David Mills to let go of the guilt he feels over his wife’s murder. Somerset pleads with David to stop carrying around his wife’s severed head in a box and sleeping with it at night.

Plot: Somerset has opened a business doing private investigating after retiring from Homicide. He hires Mills as his assistant, but warns him that this could be a very dangerous job. But Mills is no rookie to danger. He responds to Somerset’s warning by saying “You and I worked homicide for years. What makes you think we can’t handle an fast-food investigation? We’re gonna walk in there, ask them for the recipe, and be back here in time to watch Dancing with the Stars”. But the old man knows better. “Don’t be so sure David, this is a crazy business. People die over less.” Somerset warned. “Yea, I’m gonna die of starvation if we don’t get our asses down there already. Let’s go” Mills replied. They head down to the scene: McDonald’s.

“Welcome to McDonald’s, May I take your order?” asked the attendant. “Yea, let me have a Quarter Pounder with cheese, some fries, and a…” Mills is cut off mid order by Somerset, who begins questioning the cashier. Sparing no time Somerset gets right to the point, “Listen, is there any way you could tell us the recipe for your Big Mac sandwich?” he then slides the girl a five dollar bill. The cashier’s eyes grew wide and her skin pale. “Well Mister, I can only tell you there are 8 ingredients, just eight. Now leave, please. Leave before it’s too late.” Mills quipped, “Yea, they might spit in my Quarter Pounder”. Somerset interjected, “Damn it Mills can’t you be serious for once?” He then turns back to the cashier and asks her one last question. “Can you tell us anything else, anything at all?” but it’s too late. Before Somerset can even catch his breath, four men dressed as Ronald McDonald, grab Mills and Somerset, and throw them out of the building.

Somerset is reviewing old newspaper articles. “I don’t understand why you waste your time with that garbage, Somerset.” Mills said. “Personally, I think we need to go back there, shoot first, and ask questions later.” Mills then holds his gun in the air. “Mills, I found the ingredients! It’s right here in an ad for a McDonald’s grand opening from over 20 years ago in Dekalb County, GA. Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.” Somerset said excitedly. “I don’t know if senility is kicking in already old man, but that’s only seven ingredients. We’re looking for eight… remember? The man who hired us said it needed to be eight” Mills replied. “But what if the eighth ingredient is in the special sauce?  We have to find out what that sauce is made of.” Somerset said. “Tastes like Russian dressing to me, I don’t get the big deal.” Mills thought out loud while eating a Big Mac. “I’ve eaten 100 of these things since we started this gig and still can’t figure it out. Too bad you’re a vegetarian, because I could use some input.”

Somerset and Mills have infiltrated McDonald’s main headquarters and are about to enter the Big Mac preparation room. “This is it, Mills. Remember what I said, stay cool” warned Somerset. “I got this.” Mills said as he kicked in the door. The room is filled with tanks and tanks of the special sauce and foul almost putrid odor. The tanks are so large Mills and Somerset feel dwarfed by their height. They slowly make their way towards the back of the room. Then they hear something coming from a room marked private. It’s sounds like people screaming. They run towards it. “There!” yelled Somerset, Oh No!” “What the hell is he doing?” Mills wondered. “Mills, go away from here!” screamed Somerset, “Go away, now!” Mills refused and moved forward.  Somerset can’t believe his eyes. Inside the private room is a midget wearing a Ronald McDonald costume feeding former McDonald’s employees into giant food processors. The processor leads right into the “special sauce” tanks. “No!” Mills screamed as her drew his gun, “No! I can’t… I ate…” “Mills, just walk away, don’t you understand if you kill him, he wins?” “Yes detectives, you have experienced the 8th ingredient. How did all those employees taste going down?” The midget smirked.  “This is what happens when you dig your nose too deep down the rabbit hole. Now you must kill the source. Shoot me!” screams the midget. “Oh God, No” Mills cried. “Ahh..” “No Mills, No!” begged Somerset. But it was too late. Mills fired his gun into the midget 8 times. One for each ingredient.

Guest Bio: This article was lovingly written by the cavalcade of writers at Don’t You Hate Pants? If you’d like to read more about our particular sense of humor visit www.dontyouhatepants.net. We also have a Pantless Babe of the Week. She’s very pretty.

Memorable Scene: A 35-minute dance off between Zombie Poppins and the Haitian dance crew. Every sick move in the book is presented. Then Vanilla Ice makes a cameo but Zombie Poppins rips his head off mid rap. She then proceeds to eat his brain in front of the audience.

Plot: Things go terribly wrong when Marry Poppins’ is a little tipsy on a late night umbrella ride and on her way down she gets tangled in some electrical wires and before you can say supercalifragilisticexpialidocious she sends London into a blackout and herself to the morgue. Thousands of children mourn Mary Poppins, as her body was laid to rest, but two of her favorite children are noticeably shaken by the news. On a sudden whim the children decide to swipe Mary’s secret diary at the funeral, which is resting in her lifeless hands. This way they can remember her always. One year later, on the anniversary of her death, the two children go to her gravesite and recite what they think is poem from her diary. After each progressive line flows from their mouths the sky grows darker and the ground begins to shake. Soon Mary Poppins’ grave begins to split and her poorly decayed body slithers from beneath the dirt. The children try to flee before zombie Poppins notices their presence, but she’s already caught their innocent smell. It seems like Mary Poppins was more then a nanny, she was a full-fledged witch, and now she’s a bloodthirsty zombie with a taste for brains. Mary catches up with the children down the road and enjoys her first undead meal.
With the blood of the innocent on her newly risen hands Mary Poppins dishes out magical justice against the children who won’t listen to their parents… Broccoli haters, kite flyers, girls who wear skirts above the knee, all will pay for their crimes. Word spreads quickly of the horror’s being caused by zombie Poppins. Even the police are powerless to stop her. It isn’t until zombie Poppins ventures down to mean streets of London’s East Side that she meets her match. When the Haitian break-dance crew from the East Side hears about zombie Poppins they know the perfect way to stop her. They grew up in the land of the zombie. Haitian legend has it that the only way to beat a zombie is challenge them to dance a dance off. The complicated movements and scandalous gyrations should throw Poppins off her game. But the “Devil’s music” is what will send her straight back to Hell. The Haitian dance crew will meet zombie Poppins for a final show down on the gritty streets of London’s East Side.

A break-dancing duel ensues… and finally ends as Mary Poppins and locks her shoulder out of place and sends her hand flying towards the kids. They finish the spell, avoid the projectile arm and banish Poppins to the netherworld. As they walk away triumphantly, no one seems to notice the arm is still present, and gets one last twitch before all fades to black.

Guest Bio: This article was lovingly written by the cavalcade of writers at Don’t You Hate Pants? If you’d like to read more about our particular sense of humor visit www.dontyouhatepants.net. We also have a Pantless Babe of the Week. She’s very pretty.

Memorable Scene: At one Book Club meeting a good friend and neighbor has a slight allergic reaction to peanut brittle. As he lies on the living room floor the group surrounds him and begins to chant his name. “His name was Chet Burnstein. His name was Chet Burnstein.” They repeat over and over. The chant continues until Chet sits up and reminds the group that he’s fine. He was simply lying on the floor until his asthma subsided.

Plot: Edward Norton reprises his role as the insomniac with multiple personalities. Though his life seems to be headed in a different direction after surviving a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head and the revelation that his best friend Tyler Durden was in fact his own psychosis. With his life in shambles this former insomniac turns to the only women he’s ever truly loved for support, Marla Singer. The two form a close bond and he a Marla settle down in the suburbs where they eventually get married in small ceremony at their local rec-center. After a few unsuccessful pregnancies Marla finally gives birth to twin boys named Tyler and Durden. When things start to get too stressful around the house for Marla, her husband suggests joining a club with some of their friends from the neighborhood. He decides to start a book club where the rules are simple. The first rule of book club is; you do not talk about book club, and the second rule of book club is that you have to bring a snack, and if this is your first night at book club, you better ready to have some fun!

Book club was fun. Everyone enjoyed reading about the adventures of Bella and Edward in “Twilight” and they had a good cry over “Fried Green Tomatoes”. Book Club brought Marla and her husband closer together, or so he thought. Soon Marla would begin making every decision for her husband. They would go shopping for the kids on the weekends and do laundry every Friday night as scheduled. Then Marla started picking out her husband’s outfits and before he knew it, they were walking around the mall in matching cat sweaters. Even Book Club grew out of control once Marla took over. She turned their simple social event into deep book dissections that would last hours. There was nothing the insomniac could do but drink his problems away and let his sleep escape him once again. It wasn’t until Marla started bringing up extended trips with the in-laws, that her husband realized he had once again blurred the line between reality and imagination. She wasn’t the same person he had married… she wasn’t even real. The only way to escape Marla was to finish what he started years before. The insomniac needed to take his own life. With his gun gripped firmly in hand he interrupted a man reading “Hi God It’s Me Margret” and proceeds to fire the gun into his mouth. I am Jack’s boring suburban life.

Guest Bio: This article was lovingly written by the cavalcade of writers at Don’t You Hate Pants? If you’d like to read more about our particular sense of humor visit www.dontyouhatepants.net. We also have a Pantless Babe of the Week. She’s very pretty.

Independence Day 2 – Labor Day

Tagline: Don’t plan on wearing white after today, because we’ll all be dead.

Synopsis: The Alien Invaders are back and this time they’re prepared. With the humans caught off guard we soon find the Human race on the verge of extinction, again.

Memorable Scene: The Alien’s have decided to call Microsoft’s tech support about their computer virus. Once they finally get through they’re placed on hold forever and then transferred to a call center in India. After a long heated exchange between the Alien the young Indian gentleman, the Alien informs the customer service representative that India is now first on his list of countries to destroy. That is once their computer system is up and running.

Plot: Its one year later on August 30th and humanity is still in the process of cleaning up and coming to grip with the fact that we are not alone. Though many are celebrating our underdog win over the alien invaders. There are those who have warned humanity about the need to stay vigilant. These small groups of international leaders have been labeled “paranoid” for their views. Their constant bell ringing about the possibility of a second invasion seems to fall on deaf ears due to they’re lack of coverage by the mainstream press. It seems the media is a little preoccupied with President Thomas Whitmore’s (Bill Paxton) affair with his communications director Constance Spano (Margaret Colin). He quickly fell from hero to tabloid villain within a few months. Though the President’s not the only Independence Day hero whose life has taken a drastically different direction. Former Air Force pilot Steven Hiller’s (Will Smith) life seems to be changing as well. Hiller is in process of filming a major motion picture based on his life and experiences with the Aliens, playing himself. Over night, Steven Hiller went from pilot, to hero, and now movie star. David Levinson (Jeff Goldblum) also made some impressive moves in his life after his pseudo celebrity status as a scientist. He was asked to join a team of real scientists on a secluded island who were experimenting with dinosaur DNA. No one has heard from Levinson since his trip. The world will soon need these three men once again.

On Sept. 2nd multiple Alien warships are witnessed hovering over every major city. The Invaders seemed poised for a second attack and this time they came prepared. They’ve been studying us for the past year. Waiting in the shadows for the perfect time to strike and the President’s affair seemed to provide the perfect distraction. Throw in the long holiday weekend and you have yourself a perfect storm of events. Most news stations were so relentless with their coverage of the President’s affair that they didn’t even bother to report the massive alien ships floating above the cities. Even when people finally realized what was going on they were powerless to stop it. People from coast to coast cried out for Captain Steven Hiller to come to their rescue once again, but due to his binding contract with the studio, he wasn’t able to stop filming for fear of a lawsuit. Even David Levinson was nowhere to be found in this time of crisis. Sadly, there were no other cable repairmen turned computer hackers with his skill level left in the world. The Alien invaders did update their Norton Anti-Virus software as a precaution, just in case Levinson showed up. Once all of humanity’s options had run out, the Invaders destroyed every major city once again. Then, they seized control of the population. All of humanity was forced to serve their Alien masters and work in Alien labor camps.

Guest Bio: This article was lovingly written by the cavalcade of writers at Don’t You Hate Pants? If you’d like to read more about our particular sense of humor visit www.dontyouhatepants.net. We also have a Pantless Babe of the Week. She’s very pretty.

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• It co-stars Melina Mercouri, the anti-Junta Greek actress who later became a member of the Pan-Hellenic Parliament and Greece’s minister of culture after spending years as an outspoken critic (and target) of anti-democratic forces.
• Abram S. Ginnes wrote the screenplay. Ginnes was a lifelong radical, a labor organizer and a victim of anti-communist blacklisting during the 1950s.
• The movie is an adaptation of Ben Hecht’s undoubtedly embellished autobiographical works. Hecht, a prolific Oscar-winning screenwriter, spent time on an English blacklist due to his strong support of the Zionist movement in Palestine.
• United Artists released Gaily Gaily in 1969, in the thick of a movement toward more overtly political film making.
• Norman Jewison, who has tackled a variety of social and political issues in his movies, directed Gaily Gaily.

In reality, Gaily Gaily is anything but a politically charged movie. It’s really nothing more than a sepia-toned dramedy with an impressive cast, nice period costuming and a glass smooth Henry Mancini score.

Beau Bridges is Ben Hecht. Actually, he’s Ben Harvey. That’s right, they somehow managed to turn Ben Hecht, the very namesake of the SS Ben Hecht that braved the British blockade of Palestine, into a WASP-y blond kid. Anyway, young Bridges is a sexually frustrated teen from Galena who has a thing for cleavage. With the support of his dear grandmother, he heads off to Chicago in hopes of a slightly more exciting and cleavage-rich lifestyle than Galena can provide.

He’s robbed on the train. Bordello boss Queen Lil takes care of him. He becomes a cub newspaper reporter. There are minor twists and turns as comedic reporters and politicians drink, drink and drink some more. People chase one another as bouncy Mancini music plays in the background.

Old school newspaper reporters are loveable rascals. Irish guys are drunks. Prostitutes have hearts of gold. Politicians are corrupt, but not necessarily evil. Melina Mercouri is beautiful. Margot Kidder makes her film debut. Bridges has that vaguely confused look on his face that dominates most of his early performances. Every scene features an instantly recognizable character actor (Brian Keith, Hume Cronyn, George Kennedy, etc.).

Gaily Gaily is pretty like a gilded old photograph. It snagged three Oscar nominations (costumes, art/set decoration and music).

Unfortunately, it’s boring. And, to be honest, it’s pretty damn stupid. It’s certainly disappointing.

It’s also strange. Gaily Gaily is a throwback movie made and released during a period of innovation and boundary testing. Hollywood’s output was commenting on larger issues in a grittier way than ever before. Yet Gaily Gaily’s collection of politically aware and talented artists made a movie that, at its very best, is nothing more than a quaint source of vanilla half-chuckles.

Harris is going to star in the Smurfs movie. This Smurfs movie is reportedly going to be a mix of both live action and animation. This means Harris is not just going to be voicing one of the Smurfs. He is reported to be playing the lead live action character.

Filming for the movie will commence this coming April, which will coincide with the end of the filming for Harris’ hit CBS sitcom “How I Met Your Mother.” The movie is expected to be released on July 29, 2011. Raja Gosnell will be directing the movie.

Apparently, Stiller is currently negotiating to star in the Universal Pictures movie Trump Heist. The movie, which may be retitled Tower Heist, will be about a group of con artists who think up of a plan to swindle the people who live in the upscale Trump Tower in New York.

As I have previously mentioned, Eddie Murphy was attached to this movie as the lead star. He was supposed to co-star with other black comics Chris Rock, Chris Tucker and Dave Chappelle. But with Stiller now taking over, the script is being rewritten and a new direction is going to be taken.

Brett Ratner is said to be attached to direct the movie.

Hugh Grant’s stammer had a clumsy kind of charm that worked in “Four Weddings and a Funeral” and, to some degree, “Notting Hill.” (We also concede that “About a Boy” was surprisingly entertaining, but it just fell flat at “Music and Lyrics” and “Two Weeks Notice”).

But the lameness factor just hit rock bottom with his latest movie, “Did you Hear about the Morgans?” He teams up with Sarah Jessica Parker, to deliver a totally forgettable romantic comedy that makes you want to say, “No I haven’t heard about the Morgans– and they’re not worth hearing about.”

Hugh once again dons that pained expression, as he plays Paul Morgan, whose marriage to Meryl (Parker) is on the rocks after his recent infidelity. He tries to win her back. She isn’t interested. And actually the whole audience why they’re together at all, because the two have no chemistry on-screen.

Their marriage is saved by, of all things, a murder. They both witness it, and they are sent by the FBI to a rural town that’s worlds away from their Manhattan lifestyle.

Hugh’s saving grace is his ability to give great one-liners, which periodically break the monotony of the movie. Unfortunately the good ones are too few and far between… just like Hugh’s movie career.

Then a case opens, and Holmes tries to woo back his partner. So starts this comedy adventure. It’s your usual winning formula of villain on the quest for world domination + lovable hero + loyal sidekick + romantic sideplots. The movie also tops into the latest trend of witch craft and magic. Hmm. Sherlock meets Lord Voldemort.

The fight scenes are decent, with moments of genius. Watch for the scene at the shipyard. Unfortunately, Director Guy Ritchie tends to overedit some of the best sequences. Even the musical score has some great moments. Nothing to win an Oscar, but quite good for an action movie.

You get the feeling, after watching the movie, that the producers are gearing you up for a sequel. It may actually be a good idea. Robert Downey Jr. does a pretty good job of giving the Sherlock Holmes of classic lit a modern, sorta-sexy/sorta-funny vibe (the way Johnny Depp made being a pirate cool). And considering the Holmes-Watson tradition, there’s a deep well of possible story lines and a deep fan base who’ll follow the pair in whatever crazy adventure they get themselves into. (It may also turn the new generation towards the classics, and help them rediscover Sherlock Holmes and actually read the book!)

The movie tackles the love story of a divorced couple who are friendly but get, uhm, a little too close during their child’s college graduation party. After way too many drinks they end up sleeping together (talk about a different kind of family reunion!).

It throws Jane (Meryl Streep) off balance. She’s finally over her ex, who cheated on her and impregnated his mistress (and later married her). Finally, her life’s going great — new business, more confidence, and a “kinda-sorta” dating thing going with her architect, played by Steve Martin.So, now… “it’s complicated.”

Common sense is to stay away from her ex, but no — they keep having sex (and a little marijuana). And so follows a comedy of errors, which will entertain you. What do you expect from a movie with Steve Martin and The Office’s John Krasinski? Just don’t over analyze it, which sadly, Meryl Streep sometimes does. Laugh, and pass the popcorn.

We always knew “Bruno” would be controversial and what’s happened in Britain and Ukraine is just more proof that not everyone can handle the film.

According to Reuters, Ukraine has banned “Bruno” from being shown in theaters and sold in DVDs after its culture ministry commission decided that the film “included an artistically unjustified exhibition of sexual organs and sexual relations, homosexual acts in a blatantly graphic form, obscene language, sadism, anti-social behavior which could damage the moral upbringing of our citizens.” The commission’s decision is not surprising since Sacha Baron Cohen’s previous film “Borat” was also banned in Ukraine. Time reported that Deputy Culture Minister Tymofiy Kokhan, head of the commission, told them that 9 out of the 14 commission’s experts voted to ban the film. Evhen Minko, chief editor of media-watchdog magazine Telekritika,is however concerned because he says that the comission’s decision shows that they do not understand the film at all. Taras Karasiychuk, director of the Gay Alliance of Ukraine, stated though that the comission’s decision was not really out of a moral standpoint but to earn points with the elections coming up. He says, “It’s more populism than a desire to protect morals.”

Meanwhile in Britain, where the film is enjoying great popularity, Universal Studios decided to release an edited version of “Bruno” so that younger audiences can see the film. The edited version, which will be just about 2 minutes shorter the original version, will open in British theaters in July 24 and can be seen by anyone 15 and above. Now this decision clearly does not show intolerance or ignorance but sound judgement.

Studio Weekend Actuals: July 10 to July 12, 2009
1 Brüno – $30,619,130
2 Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs – $27,607,497
3 Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen – $24,213,875
4 Public Enemies – $13,794,240
5 The Proposal – $10,603,884
6 The Hangover – $9,933,238
7 I Love You, Beth Cooper – $4,919,433 3
8 UP – $4,715,746
9 My Sister’s Keeper – $4,294,382
10 The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 – $1,543,516

Bruno, though topping the weekend box office, is predicted by some to not only rake less money in compared to “Borat” but also have a short run. The reason for this is that “Bruno” did a lot better last Friday ($14.4 million) than Saturday ($8.8 million), which might mean that it is quickly losing steam. According to Universal distribution president Nikki Rocco the figure does not automatically equate to that though since such occurrences are usual during summer.

“Bruno” as we well know stars Sacha Baron Cohen and, like his first very notorious and successful film “Borat”, the movie is as shocking as ever, if not more. “Bruno” shows the exploits of a gay Australian fashion designer out to conquer America. Surely this film will turn out to be as controversial as ever given its very explicit content. My only tip would be to watch this film if you liked “Borat” and steer clear or regret it if you didn’t.

As for Eminem I only have one message for you: If you aren’t over the butt incident during the MTV Movie Awards better not watch “Bruno” because it will bring it all back to you.

As for the plot of the story there isn’t much you can say about it because there’s really not much of a story beyond Larry Daley (Ben Stiller) running around, in, and under the Smithsonian trying to save his wax friends and the world from Kahmunrah. The attempt to add depth to the story by giving us a lesson on doing what we love was more like an afterthought just so we can say that the movie had a story beyond trying to get some good laughs out of the audience. The ending was fun but ruined by the oh so corny appearance of the reincarnation/complete opposite of Amelia Earhart (Amy Adams).

All in all the movie was funny enough but I could have lived without seeing it on the big screen.

Not surprisingly the movie was mobbed by young girls ranging from toddlers (2yrs old) to teenagers (17yrs old). I guess the fact that many fans had to be accompanied by their moms of course helped boost the ticket sales.

Disney is of course very please with the results and as Chuck Viane, Disney’s president of domestic theatrical distribution said, “Outside of Wow! what can you say?” They also expressed surprise at the movie’s success but considering the success of the previous Hannah Montana movie I can’t help but think that the surprise is a bit contrived.The movie is the first Hannah Montana non-concert movie. The last movie, “Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert Tour,” was opened just a mill shy of thisone last year and ended up with a total of $65 million in total. It is now hailed as the top grossing movie concert of all time. With this record we can be sure that this new movie will be doing equally well if not better.

As for the plot of the movie anyone who’s seen the tv show knows what to expect.

Big Stan is about a con artist who, when he found out that he was going to prison, prepares by learning martial arts. Stan (Rob Schneider) is trained by “The Master” (David Carradine). When he arrives in prison he immediately sets out to make a reputation for himself and eventually becomes the big man in prison. He teaches fellow prisoners to co-exist in peace and thwarts the plans of the corrupt warden (Scott Wilson) to produce a bloody riot.

Though definitely not a deep movie it is worth watching if you are in the mood for something light-hearted. Rob Schneider’s attempt in action is also commendable with the scenes believable enough yet still managing to retain the humorous side each time. So if you’re looking for a few belly laughs this weekend go buy Big Stan settle down for an hour and a half of laughs.

I used to think that I did not really like “stupid” funny movies. That is, until I experienced Will Ferrell many years ago. I still can’t stop laughing just thinking about Talladega Nights. And there are many others too. Even Austin Powers makes me laugh. And I remember liking Pink Panther to a certain degree.

The sequel, Pink Panther 2, is something else, however. It just is not the same! I couldn’t believe how rehashed the concepts and lines were – and we are supposed to have fun? It just seems to me that the people behind Pink Panther 2 were trying too hard to make the audience laugh. And believe me, there is nothing worse than a comedian trying too hard. Oh wait, there is something worse – a group of comedians in a movie trying too hard!

To be honest, I was afraid that I had lost my sense of humor while watching the movie. I thought that perhaps, it was just me. But no, other viewers felt exactly the same way! Colin Covert of Star Tribune writes:

Ponzi schemes and lowbrow comedies may be the only parts of the U.S. economy that work. The skid mark that is “Paul Blart, Mall Cop” has scarcely been mopped up and now comes Steve Martin’s insufferably stupid “Pink Panther 2″ (★ out of four stars, rated PG for some suggestive humor, brief mild language and action). Recycling bins have fresher content than this listless exercise in check-the-boxes moviemaking.

And as he said, “If you buy a ticket for this one, mon ami, le joke is on you.”

Yeah, the joke was on me…

Since I started talking about Marley & Me in the previous post, I thought that I might as well review it for this post. After all, the movie outgrossed a Brad Pitt movie on its day of release – there must be something to it, right? If you do not know it yet, the movie is based on the book written by John Grogan, a journalist who wrote about real life “adventures” with his family and dog named – you guessed it – Marley.

Owen Wilson plays John Grogan while Jennifer Aniston plays his wife. The movie starts off with the couple leaving Michigan for Florida, in an attempt to start a family. They are both journalists and work for two different papers – competitors at that.

The story sounds common enough, doesn’t it? What sets the movie apart from all the other releases on the same day?

I think that the “normalcy” of the story is what makes it so appealing to the average movie goer. Plus, you can’t really go wrong with a dog. Marley, after all, comes from the species that we all call “man’s bestfriend.” More than being a “dog story,” however, I really think that the plot, which revolves around family life and its complications, is what makes the movie a good one. It is not extraordinary. The truths set forth by the movie are things that we all encounter in our daily lives. And sometimes, that is what we are after when we watch movies. We want to know that we are not the only ones experiencing these things.

Easy viewing without the fantastic element, that’s what made the movie $14.8M on its first day.

While many would argue that the issue is all about the films in question and not the marital affairs (or lack thereof) of the actors involved, there is no doubt that the two ideas cannot be separated in the case of Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt. These two had a highly publicized falling out when Brad Pitt wandered and ended up with Angelina Jolie. Jennifer Aniston was recently quoted as saying some not so happy things about the current couple.

At the end of the day, however, movie sales are what we are all about and it seems that Jennifer Aniston came out on top of this matter. The Christmas release of the two movies – Marley & Me and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, the former Jen’s while the latter Brad’s – has proven to be an unpredictable race. As it turns out, Marley & Me grossed at $14.8M, around $3M more than Benjamin Button.

Well I would have to say that this is a great Christmas present for the actress, who, despite releasing amicable words about the “competition,” is certainly harboring some secret hope that she could one up her ex this time around. Yeah, I am probably going out on a limb here by writing that but hey, she is human after all and any human being would harbor a desire of that sort, right?

All I can say is congratulations to Jen on the success of her Christmas release! Same to Brad Pitt, I guess.

They howled and clapped, munching popcorn while cheering the figures on the screen — a normal movie theatre scene elsewhere, but revolutionary in Saudi Arabia where films have not played publicly for decades.

In what took hush-hush negotiations with senior political officials and the strict religious police, the Red Sea port of Jeddah and the nearby city of Taif allowed the Rotana entertainment group, owned by powerful Saudi tycoon Prince Alwaleed bin Talal, to put on its new comedy “Manahi” for nine days.
The result was overwhelming, the 1,200-seat hall hardly meeting the demand for the 15-riyal (four-dollar) tickets over more than a week.

This just goes to show that movies really do make a difference in people’s lives, don’t you think? Now I wonder if they will ever get around to showing movies from Hollywood anytime soon?

Jim Carrey is one of the funniest of the funny men in Hollywood. I am sure that this statement is subject to one’s opinion but in my mind, if you want to watch a movie that will allow you to relax and NOT think (which is what majority of us Americans need at the moment, then go look for a Jim Carrey film.

I am not so sure about his latest flick, though – Yes Man. The trailers looked pretty funny to me, but then most – if not all – of Jim Carrey’s movies trailers always look hilarious. I have not seen the movie so I am basically relying on other reviews to decide whether or not to spend time and money on Yes Man.

Michael Sragow of The Baltimore Sun shot the story down:

Let’s be clear: If ever a movie mistook a premise for a plot, it’s this one. Some films suffer from a surfeit of one-liners. This picture evaporates midway through because the story itself is a one-liner. Yet it also has a cast that gets into the silliness. This film’s lead actors can turn odd curves into dynamite goofballs.

He did give credit to the lead actor and the rest of the cast, though. The movie was portrayed in a more flattering light by Moira Macdonald of The Seattle Times:

Dear readers, this is not cinematic history in the making, or comic genius, or even especially clever. But in this season of movies crammed full with Nazis, depressed suburbanites, dying dogs and murdered politicians, I was grateful for it. It was funny. It was light. It was a moment, and it worked, and then the movie moved on. Sometimes, during the end-of-year marathon of Serious and Important Movies, you need to watch somebody saying something goofy and then tripping. Thanks, Jim.

I think I’ve got my answer. This is exactly what I am looking for right now.

The movie is about a young scientist who tries to save the planet from catastrophes that endanger mankind. Among the cast is a buffoon president (sounds familiar) and a manic depressive head of NASA.

The movie is said to be a satire much like Airplane.

According to different media sources a new Ghostbusters film is being developed by Columbia Pictures. This is not going to be a reboot though, but a sequel to the original movies. The script is reportedly already being developed. What’s bugging Ghostbusters fans is whether the original cast of Billy Murray, Harold Ramis, Dan Aykroyd and Ernie Hudson will be back.

Harold Ramis, in an interview, revealed that the Judd Apatow will be involved in the new movie as a producer and that Ramis, Aykroyd and original director Ivan Reitman are consulting on the project. Bill Murray may also get involved at some point in the project. The coup here is that the old ghostbusters will appear in the movie as mentors.

Who do you guys think should be the new Ghostbusters?

You have, of course, the “Mean Girls” rip-off — Phi Iota Mu — who want to steal the nerds’ home. And the smart-but-nerdy guy who eventually wins the centerfold’s heart. Whole thing seems to be a mish-mash of “Hottie and Nottie” and “Legally Blonde” and “Clueless.” But without the lovable charm of Alicia Silverstone or Reese Witherspoon, and the natural entertainment value of Paris Hilton.

In times of crisis, people have a tendency to flock to movies and other forms of entertainment that have themes that will make them laugh or just forget about the pressures of real life. With the global oil crisis affecting every single person on Earth (well, maybe not the Chinese) and food shortage a looming problem in the future, it’s quite justifiable that people would want to see a movie that would bring a smile to their faces.

One of the summer season comedy releases this year is The Love Guru. The movie stars Mike Myers and deals with the story of a “Hindu” love guru tasked to save the marriage of a Toronto Mapleleafs hockey player before it eventually ruins the team’s chances of winning the Stanley Cup. Yes, that’s the synopsis of the movie. If you think it sounds shallow and unfunny, well you’ve hit the nail right on the head.

People who were expecting the kind of gross but ultimately super-funny gags and sequences in Myers’ Austin Powers are in for a huge disappointment when they see this movie. It’s one of the unfunniest movies that I have seen in years (although that frigging Spartan movie gives this a run for its money). I’ve always considered Myers as a comic genius but in this particular outing, he falls flat on his face.

The basic problem is that the movie’s premise is just too shallow and revolves around making fun of cultural differences as the formula for the comedy, and that’s never a good source of comedy for longer than two minutes.

One thing that I’ve confirmed with this movie though is that Myers leaning more and more towards crude humor—toilet comedy if you may. The depiction of boogers, bodily functions and genitalia is just so juvenile. I’ve expected a little more from Myers in this movie because it’s been a long time since we’ve seen him on screen. But the guy has actually regressed.

And it’s not only his visual gags that are gross, even his puns suffer the same fate. Just like naming his teachers various names like Tugginmapuda. It’s not really funny AT ALL.

I don’t think I would be able to say this in an actual movie review but Jessica Alba’s meager talents are wasted here. They could’ve used a no-name actress and no one would’ve noticed. Justin Timberlake may be hitting his head for actually allowing himself to appear in this movie as it could really ruin his chances of establishing a movie career.

The only highlights of this movie for me are the well-placed cameos from Val Kilmer and Marishka Hargitay (which really is a good dig at Guru Pitka’s greeting of “Marishka Hargitay”) and Myers’ performance of 9 to 5, More Than Words and The Joker that were given a Bollywood bent. It’s the only signs here that Myers could still cook up something funny if he really, really tried hard enough.

As it is, this movie is just as memorable as the dung that Pitka’s pet elephant produces.

Rating: D-