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Simon Belmont to “Stomp the Yard” in Castlevania

June 15, 2007 by Michael

castlevania.jpgCastlevania has a new director.  Formely, Paul W.S. Anderson (or Paul “POS” Anderson as I like to call him) of Aliens vs. Predator and Resident Evil fame (which should be enough to keep him from ever directing anything ever again right there) was originally supposed to direct the film adaption of one of the greatest NES games of all time, but has pulled out of that directing duty to make “Death Race” instead.

Paul did still write the script, though, so his sucktastic hand of death isn’t completely removed from this film.

The new director Sylvain White however, is sure to instill confidence.  Why?

His last film was “Stomp the Yard.”

If this were a stand-up act…this is where the crickets would chirp.

This movie is doomed.

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